I was lounging in bed yesterday morning when the toddler one was holding my phone in his hand. Nothing out of the ordinary. I was just about to reach for it when I saw it…the screen went wonky…like REAL WONKY. Two seconds later…complete darkness…

That’s how it’s been living ever since. RIP phone that’s been cracked for a really long time, was really slow, and had zero battery life. I won’t really miss you. And I don’t think my kids will either…

My son is ALWAYS telling me “mommy put phone down”, cuz it’s always like right there next to me. We don’t have a house phone, so it basically follows me wherever we go. And I think my son hates it.

I’m always trying to snapchat him to grandparents. Or take a video of him doing something funny. Or just documenting him eating mac n cheese like cookie monster, because I have issues about forgetting these moments and I want them DOCUMENTED.

I went an entire day yesterday not documenting ANYTHING….it gives me a bit of the shakes, but one thing that I did do yesterday was have a 20 minute conversation with him post-nap in his little bed about Marshall and Chase and the types of cars they drive and the way that Ryder rides a 4 wheeler and Chase drives a Police Car and Rocky drives a stinky garbage truck. I also didn’t sit on the couch scrolling mindlessly through instagram and actually fully paid attention to a TV Show…Survivor this season is getting really good yall (#its2005upinhere). And there wasn’t that feeling of “I better check my phone in case I got a text or something”…cuz…i know no one can reach me…IM UNREACHABLE! (syke, you can gchat me, but thats it).

Now, I am anxiously awaiting the arrival of the used iphone that will help get me to August because Verizons customer service is basically the WORST (aka theyre jerks)…but for these two or three days that I am phone-less, I think my kids are going to enjoy feeling “unplugged”.

So, if you’ve texted, snapchatted, or attempted to contact me in the last 24 hours…homey didn’t get it…homey’s stranded in phoneless purgatory…homey also hasn’t left the neighborhood since Sunday…homey is now a hermit. Send help.